


Mr Parker and Me - ALTERNATE ENDING  (part 2 of My Love and Me) 18+

by a starker slut (louielouie)



Series: My Love and Me (3 Parts) [3]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Alternate Ending, Angst, Character Death, Cheating, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Death, Depressing, Depression, I Made Myself Cry, M/M, Sad, Sad Ending, Sad and Sweet, Suicide, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-23
Updated: 2020-07-23
Packaged: 2021-03-05 03:56:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25464349
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/louielouie/pseuds/a%20starker%20slut
Summary: So I began to write this fic in a good mood, then shit happened IRL and I felt all of this stuff and wrote it into my fic, this wasn't the ending I wanted but I wanted to share this very depressing ending that could happen in this storyline, TWS!!!!!!!!!!!! read the tags and below; suicide attempt, depression, this is a very sad fic.This is continuing from Falling (chapter 4) of Mr Parker and Me- and is not accurate with the remainder of that fic when I eventually write it.please don't read this if it could trigger you.
Relationships: Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Peter Parker/Tony Stark
Series: My Love and Me (3 Parts) [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1754989
Kudos: 10





	Mr Parker and Me - ALTERNATE ENDING  (part 2 of My Love and Me) 18+

Alt end ver

Tony’s POV

Tony grimaced as Peter’s texts kept pouring into his phone, the cold air rushing through his shivering frame. 

Tony swung his legs and looked out at the cliff’s edge to the horizon and wondered if there was anything in his life he wouldn’t ruin. The sun was slinking under the mountains that Tony could see, and the clouds were becoming a darker, lonelier shade of purple as the sun disappeared from view. Tony sighed and allowed his thoughts to wander into the deep, dark place he normally dispised. 

Tony hated himself, he hated himself normally for all the things he’d ever done in his life, and now more than ever he just felt anger and guilt for the majority of the choices he’d made in his miserable life. Tony shivered as the air dramatically cooled - the sun had abandoned him too it seemed. He didn’t move though, maybe the cold would help him to numb his mind, drown out the thoughts, cool the self-inflicting rage. All this would help him to keep breaking is his already very broken, guilty, horrible heart. 

Tony had never been that committed to anything, he’d had too many affairs away from Pepper to be able to count (with not a shred of guilt attached), and hadn’t turned to look back at her when they’d had their divorce three years ago. He’d been strangely committed to Peter, but the first night he was away from his boyfriend, he’d jumped into Pepper’s bed - and … well … old habits die hard as they say. 

Pepper had finally escaped Tony, and the cloud of pain that he always smothered her with. Peter, poor innocent Peter, had been drugged under Tony’s cloud and would soon realise that Tony’s disappearance would be a good thing, the fog would clear and Tony would be proven right. Peter and Pepper and everyone he’d ever been near, would be better off without him. They would be free from the pain and the abuse and the neglect that Tony covered with money, jokes and false pretences. 

Tony had feelings for both Peter and Pepper, he’d loved both of them… in his own special way. That usually meant that Tony didn’t tire of these people as quickly as he normally did. He liked being around these people because they made him feel an ounce better than normal, and for a few rare moments, the anxieties and the depressing, intrusive voices would shut up and he would be able to appreciate being around a truly good person for a while. Peter and Pepper were good, and they sometimes inspired Tony to be better... other times they made him feel worse about himself because he was so bad, negligent and had done so many horrible things to the world throughout his life. 

Tony thought back to all of the times in his life where he’d put money first, before other people’s lives. He thought about the weapons his dad had handed over to him, not once had a thought occurred to him to destroy it all, end Stark Industries’ business, neither had protecting the little guy - instead Tony had ideas of getting the most amount of money possible, selling to the highest bidder and letting them do what they wanted with the WMDs. (A/N = Weapon(s) of Mass Destruction)

Tony, of course, had done the right thing - only AFTER he had been pointed in the face with his own creations. He only had realised the mistake of his actions AFTER he’d been brought his ego on a plate; only after he was personally held accountable for his actions had he reconsidered. He had also begun to be Iron Man, and had protected the little guy - or all of Earth, and had - in the eyes of many - redeemed himself. But Tony held himself to impossibly high standards, hoping that at the end of the day he could have protected and saved as many lives as he had ruined or ended. Since neither number was accessible - even to Jarvis - Tony was left on a downwards spiral of hatred and self-destruction. 

He stopped dissociating after a while of guilt and self-pitying, to realise that he was very cold, very alone and very close to shuffling of the edge of the cliff and ‘offing’ himself. He hummed to himself, as he often did, and thought about all of his options. He was going to die tonight, he knew that - but there were a few questions he needed to answer before that. Tony shuddered as he felt the sting of hypothermia threaten to damage his body. The sky was black now, with no distinction from the clouds, apart from one that was just clipping over the surface of a thin ‘C’ of the moon. 

“How will people find me?” Tony asked himself, his voice flying out into the dark world. He knew he was in the middle of the New Mexico desert. He was alone for miles, and not an artificial light could be seen other than tiny dots on the horizon. He looked over the red, dusty ground to try and spot a pair of headlamps or a torch, out of curiosity, but saw nothing. He had no idea where he was, he’d been walking for six hours once he’d sat down on the cold floor and started swinging his legs over the edge of the cliff. He had turned off the stark glasses and thrown them in a trash can an hour into his walk, his phone was next to him but all the security measures were on so even if Jarvis wanted to help anyone and tell the world where Tony was, the AI couldn’t. Tony concluded that if anyone ever found him they should probably know who he was, so he found a biro out of one of his pockets and wrote on his forearm his name, social security number, Pepper’s mobile number and the words: “Death by suicide” as neatly as he could. 

Tony’s eyes felt heavier and heavier as time went on, and soon, once even the moon had abandoned him, he let his eyes droop close and his body finally went numb. “Ready?” he asked himself, and the cold night air. He smiled, he would finally be doing a good thing for the world. He was ready to sacrifice himself for the happiness of others. He had a momentary thought and scribbled something else on his wrist and then tipped himself forwards and let go. 

He knew he was falling, which way - he didn’t care - forwards would kill him, and backwards would kill him too. He would either die from the cold, starvation, or exhaustion; or from the fall. He didn’t care. He knew that everyone would be better off if he went - better for Peter and Pepper and Happy and Nat and Harley and Morgan. Better for him, he wouldn’t be able to hurt everyone anymore if he was dead. 

Peter was called three weeks after Tony’s disappearance by Pepper and was told what a ranger had found. He made his way down to New Mexico immediately.

Peter cried the whole way back to New York. Peter cursed Tony’s name to hell and back, smashed almost everything in his apartment and banned Jarvis from mentioning Tony’s name forever. 

Peter wore all black at the funeral, sobbed some more and met Morgan, Natasha and Harley for the first time and didn’t like it one bit. Morgan looked and acted just like her dad. She was a person Tony had never told Peter about, and probably never would have. 

Peter watched as over 2000 people mourned Tony Stark at the memorial, a swarm of black flooded New York, and the whole world, as the news of Tony Stark’s death was reported on every news station on the planet. 

Peter walked around the building he now owned and counted the number of times ‘Stark’ was written (over 300 times) and promised to himself that he would punch each reporter who tried to get a word out of him. 

Peter went to court, against the whole world, and walked out owning the largest company on Earth. Peter walked out owning something that confused everybody. He was a nobody, a 20 year old from Queens. 

Peter told the world he was SpiderMan, he joined the Avengers, and helped save a lot of people. 

Peter made it a year without Tony.

Peter jumped into the Hudson with a block of concrete tied to his torso and a bag wrapped around his head with the words “Death by suicide” written on his forearm.


End file.
